Superdad Saves the Day

Audio By Carbonatix

It was more a conversation among has-beens than superstars, so the way it all turned out was practically perfect in the end. A few other families and mine had gotten together for dinner one night, and afterwards some of the guys sat around and started talking sports. From there, it was only a matter of time until we started re-living the good old days. We swapped stories about the heroic things we did on the basketball court, the football field, or the baseball diamond in the days long before we turned thirty. Or forty. Or worse.

At this point in the evening, a guy named Jake and I got stuck on a conversation about basketball. We talked about the pick-up games we used to play when we were younger and more agile. We talked about the neighborhood guys who had ruled the courts back then, and we guessed at what had happened to them. We talked about the skills we used to have—nothing too spectacular, but definitely worlds better than we can attempt these days—and we went on about what it would be like to be young and talented again.

While we talked, Jake’s son Kyle was sitting quietly on his lap, and during this part of the conversation, I brought him into our little sports chat. “Some day, Kyle,” I said jokingly, “I’ll teach you how to shoot hoops like your dad used to be able to.” The comment was a continuation of all the other things Jake and I had been saying, but something about it rubbed Kyle the wrong way. He looked up at me with a face as serious as could be, and then he set things straight: “My dad can do anything.” It brought the house down.

If I try hard enough, I can still remember the days when my kids thought I was invincible like that. When they were really little, sometimes it seemed like they thought I was Superman. In their eyes, I could do no wrong, I had all the answers, and Michael Jordan was no match for me. As time went on and my kids got older, their opinions about their dad changed rather swiftly. Around the age of eleven, it was clear they had started thinking I had some issues. By thirteen, they were convinced of it and telling me so. By fifteen, things had come full circle; the dad who had once been perfect was now just some guy who couldn’t do anything right.

Of course, things got better again with the passing of a few more years, but by then, reality had already set in. I knew that my prime time for influencing my children was long gone. They were no longer enamored by everything I said and did. They weren’t listening to me so intently, they weren’t following me so closely, and they weren’t mimicking me so carefully. They had begun to pick up other influences along the way, and even though they chose well, their choices still limited my impact as a parent. Talk about longing for the good old days—sometimes I wanted to get a big red cape and resurrect my role as Superdad.

If you’re a dad whose children are still young, know that every day is a key opportunity to make an impact. Every interaction teaches a lesson, every word has weight, every look says something. These opportunities won’t be so common forever—are you making the most of them now? Are you doing your best to ensure that a good example is indelibly printed on your child’s mind? Someday they’ll get older, you know, and they won’t be so impressed with your hero costume. Use today to teach what matters, and teach it well. That way, down the road when they’re not so eager to listen, they won’t have to. The most important things will have already been heard.